Saturday, April 16, 2011

Ten Things (Vol. 1) : Nightmarish Moments

Saturday, April 16, 2011
I've always been a fan of scary/horror movies but am notoriously bad at handling them when bedtime comes along. When I can't sleep my mind ALWAYS goes to one or more of the following ten scenes/monsters/characters. I've ranked them in order of how likely they are to terrify me at night.

10. The Flying Monkeys - The Wizard of Oz : This can't shock anyone. Whoever saw this movie as a kid was ruined by those monkeys. The witch had nothing on them. I don't even have more to say on that. They're scary.

9. Pennywise - It : Another one that scared most kids. I saw this movie once when I was home "sick" from school and my mom was in another room (she would have never let me watch it). He is the main reason I never step on sewer drains.

8. Judge Doom - Who Framed Roger Rabbit : ...especially when he melted into nothing but eyeballs. I know it's stupid that I was scared by Christopher Lloyd, but if you never saw this as a child then you have no idea.

7. Gmork - Neverending Story : My older brother and I used to get to sleep downstairs on the couches on the weekends. We'd always watch movies and had a rotation of maybe 15 movies and this was one of them. Needless to say being in a dark room with no parents and seeing this is a scary moment. I never slept too well after watching this.

6. Baby Eater - Pan's Labyrinth : I was in high school when I saw this movie. I'll admit that. But imagine being in bed, not being able to sleep and thinking that this thing is walking towards you. The saggy skin and giant nose holes...

5. Nimbly - Neverending Story 2 : This may make you laugh at me for two reasons. I am scared of TWO characters from really poorly-made kids movies and's just a man dressed as a bird. I hated him. I never wanted to look at the screen when he was on it. Look at his beak! There's something about beaks. Beaks and goats' feet scare the hell out of me. I hate him.

4. Creepy Bear - The Shining : If you've seen the Shining you know how random and incredibly disturbing this scene is. Hotels aren't the same. So many times I've looked down hotel hallways and been scared I'd see a bear giving head (pardon the crassness) to an old man. Nothing is worse than this (also pardon the fact that there are obviously three things worse than this).

3. Regan - The Exorcist : Yup. Every Halloween this would be on TV and I'd catch 5 minute increments of it before my mom told me to turn it off. It has haunted my dreams for years and years and years. The first time I saw it all the way through was with Casey last year and I barely let him leave the room to pee. I don't like movies dealing with paranormal or demonic things. When I was a kid my family was Catholic and Catholic people teach little kids that the devil is real. So imagine me watching this and believing it could happen to me. Cool.

2. The demon - Paranormal Activity 2 : I saw this and legitimately wanted to leave at certain points. Like I said, paranormal stuff is hard for me to handle. The first PA movie was pretty scary to me but nothing I couldn't sleep after seeing. When she's dragged into the basement I KNEW I'd never go get water at night again. I still don't go downstairs after everyone's gone to bed. And I try not to get out of bed in the dark because I could be dragged all over the house. If we had a basement... ruined life. I said I wouldn't see this movie again but my form of self destruction is watching scary movies I know I'll regret seeing.

1. Donkeys - Pinocchio : If you know me at all you know I am PETRIFIED of donkeys. PETRIFIED. Last year I took a picture petting a donkey which was seriously a life-changing moment. ANYWAY. The story behind it is this idiot movie. Pinocchio done by Rabbit Ears is maybe the scariest thing I've ever seen. No. It's the scariest thing I've ever seen. The narrator, the drawings, the donkey sounds... I've been having nightmare about this movie since I was four years old. I remember those dreams more vividly than anything in real life. My brother and I are haunted by this movie. You want to know what will probably kill me? Guillermo del Toro is working on a version of Pinocchio. For those of you who don't know... he was the man behind Pan's Labyrinth. Life = over in 2014 (unless 2012 happens).

So there's that. Guess who's going to have some trouble sleeping in the same room as me tonight? Sorry Casey.

There you have it.

What movies scared/scare the bejesus out of you?


  1. I am totally with you on #4. Just thinking about it makes me want to throw up. Not even joking.

    This post makes me think I should have watched more movies as a child.

  2. That damn bear! I was just thinking about it while I was reading #5 and then lo and behold, there's the bear. And recently I watched the I am the Walrus video from Magical Mystery Tour and some of the costumes in it strongly resembled that bear. Ick.